There are what we call “truisms,” those kind of universal observations that form the basis of our collective wisdom.

You know, things like: “you can’t take it with you;” “you can’t get blood from a stone;” “the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree;” that sort of thing.

We also have the kind of generalized ethnic observations that aren’t really all that far from the truth.

Scandinavians are known to be stoic; Italians are outgoing; the Scots are taciturn.

Some of these kinds of things are actually true, as languages have a certain impact on social interaction that gives rise to these kinds of generalizations.

Which, of course, leads us to another great truism: the French are difficult.

OK. I’ve said it. But let’s be honest here, there aren’t seven people in this readership who can claim honestly that they’ve never been forced to acknowledge this hard reality from other sources.

After all, it was a French president who got up and left a G8 banquet because he was expected to eat (gasp!) British cuisine. (OK, so we all know that’s an oxymoron, but that’s not really the point, is it?)

The entire D-Day invasion almost got sidetracked by Gen. Charles de Gaulle’s anti-Anglo bigotry, in spite of the fact that the entire invasion force amassed to liberate his country’s sorry ass was comprised of English-speaking soldiers.

The point of language is that it is a means of communicating.

In Canada, some French Canadians are caught up in the notion that, unless they can communicate in French, they would prefer not to communicate at all.

Worse, there’s always somebody willing to drag the courts into this.

Some years ago, a fluently bilingual federal civil servant felt an obligation to sue Air Canada simply because he wasn’t offered a choice of soft drinks in French, despite his obvious proficiency in English.

In Alberta, a bilingual truck driver has engaged in a rampant case of faux outrage simply because the traffic ticket wasn’t printed in French.

There is no high-minded principle at work here. None.

Let’s back this up just a bit, shall we?

Every time this issue comes up, it’s important to remember that, since 1759 in Canada, the very survival of the French language has depended solely on simple British courtesy.

Without that protection, it would have faded into oblivion, like the fur trade and Napoleon’s dreams.

It’s too easy to overlook that, in a strict libertarian sense, helping the French language survive requires an inhibition of the civil liberties of those who don’t speak French.

Most of us are willing to let that slide — to a point.

But, when citizens who are fully conversant in English try to claim that their rights are somehow being violated by the lack of a French language label on a traffic ticket, then it’s time to push back.

Firstly, this isn’t a case of some poor soul accused of a high crime being forced to endure a trial in a foreign and inexplicable language.

None of us would stand for that.

It’s simply another case of a malcontent linguistic minority attempting to subject the rest of us to yet another level of governmental intrusion into our lives where none is warranted.

The logical extension of this complaint would require that all peace officers in Alberta be conversant in French, despite the fact that — on any given day — there are fewer unilingual Francophones in Alberta than there are mating pairs of Sasquatch in Clearwater County.

As I’ve said, language laws represent an unnecessary intrusion of the state into the affairs of the citizenry.

In Canada they exist solely to coddle the sensibilities of a far-too-insecure minority that can’t see the future for the past.

Those laws ignore the hard realities of linguistic evolution, especially in the context of the societal evolution of North America.

We can also surmise that it’s not likely that, had history taken a different turn, the English-speaking inhabitants of New France would have been granted the linguistic and religious privileges that came out of the English victory at Quebec.

In their present form, our language laws offend me at a very deep level. They unnecessarily expand the powers of the state and have gradually tightened the ability of the linguistic majority to participate in their own governments at several levels.

They simply prove the old adage. The French are difficult.

Bill Greenwood is a freelance writer living in Red Deer.