For too long, we’ve tolerated the inconsiderate behaviour of animals.

I say, enough is enough.

Over the past 1,000 years or so, human beings have established themselves as the superior species on this planet, yet we continue to allow wildlife to inconvenience us on a regular basis.

Mischievous gophers dig holes in our lawns, greedy bears try to steal our garbage, and careless deer seem to love hurling themselves in front of our precious automobiles.

It’s time we humans took a stand.

Lately, a few ahead-of-their-time thinkers in Alberta have proposed mass slaughtering of wildlife, namely wolves and deer. In the Provost area, the Alberta government has carried out three straight years of deer culling in an effort to curb chronic wasting disease. A total of 1,876 deer were killed in 2007. This year’s numbers are likely to be similar.

At first I was confused by this logic, but now I see that you must kill thousands of deer in order to help thousands of deer.

No, wait. I still don’t get it.

But if the government tells me it’s a good thing, it must be true.

Now the University of Alberta has teamed up with the Alberta government to kill off wolves in the Nordegg area to increase elk and deer populations. That way, hunters will have more game to hunt.

Way to go Alberta. That’s the kind of frontier attitude that finally purged the West of those awful buffalo. Just think, if we didn't occasionally blitz the odd species, right now we'd be overrun with dodos and homing pigeons.

Recently, while walking the streets of Red Deer, I noticed an abundance of rabbits inhabiting our parks and residential neighbourhoods, bounding about as if they owned the place. That got me thinking, maybe it’s time for a Red Deer rabbit cull.

I’m sure the Alberta government would be happy to sponsor an annual Bunny Bashing Day, where Red Deer residents would be encouraged to go out and club as many bunnies as possible. And while we’re at it, maybe we could take out some of those stupid squirrels that infest our parks, and how about we shoot down a few annoying songbirds that just love waking us up with their incessant chirping.

There’s no reason we — as Earth’s chosen species — should have to put up with any crap from mere animals.